Since moving out to Southern California, a place that I never thought I would end up living, I have learned more about myself then I ever thought possible. I find this statement rather entertaining for I always end up saying it after the growth that accompanies each new season. But such is life; full of constant self-discovery. Take the last year spent living in Colorado: I had 3 swim coaching jobs, was a nanny for 2 families, and picked up odd jobs or freelance art/photography work where I could. Needless to say at the end of the year I was exhausted and feeling a great deal like Bilbo Baggins when he said “I feel thin, like butter scraped over too much bread.” At first I thought the lessons learned were simply things like saying “no” can help with your sanity, calendars fill up surprisingly fast when your juggling so many schedules, and the fact that coffee was actually what Prometheus stole from the gods…not fire…don’t believe the lies… But after nearly 8 months of living in Huntington Beach, CA, I have been able to process and discover that I in fact learned a great deal more.
I think taking on all those jobs was probably the best thing I could have done coming right out of college. Now don’t get me wrong I definitely don’t recommend it for after a year I reached burn out, my drawing skills suffered for lack of practice, I got a bit fluffy for I didn’t prioritize hitting the gym, and let me be honest my attitude wasn’t the greatest for most days I returned home with extensive complaints. But of all the lessons learned the most important was that I have the power to choose how I live. I have 24 hours each day to decide what I do, 24 hours to choose how I respond to things outside of my control, 24 hours to press into who I was created to be. Every hour presents countless opportunities of incredible growth, and when I look deep inside, I realize that it is this concept of growth drives me to make the decisions that more often than not put my mother in a state of worry.
When the offer came to move to the California coast as a full time nanny I didn’t need much convincing to say yes...ok ok so actually I over thought the whole thing, talked it through with all the people I looked to for advice, and yes for those who read my last blog post, I made several pros and cons lists. But the offer came at a time where a change was much needed. Although Colorado at this point had been home for 15 years and a place that housed my amazing family and my best memories, I knew it was time to leave the familiarity and comfort of home. I never realized it was possible to have an opportunity set before you where, overthinking aside, the right decision is simultaneously the most obvious and yet the absolute hardest to make. So trusting that this change was a part of my journey I said yes, and the summer passed quickly as I packed my life in boxes, said goodbyes, and embarking on a new season of life.
Eight months later I find myself entering a fresh season of growth as a new sense of home forms. I find my hunger to discover what I am capable of accomplishing increase as I receive little tastes here and there that my dreams may just actually be achievable. And as I am blessed with a community of amazing people I am constantly challenged to remain authentic in a place known for its shallow values of beauty and status. So here I am entering my mid-twenties, learning oh so much, making plenty of mistakes, and ever longing to press even deeper into whom my Creator intends me to be.
